You may read postings on any forum, on any website, or in any advice section. You may even glance into the Cosmo, Elle, and Vogue magazines that are laying about your girlfriend’s place. In the end, you’ll probably get no closer to understanding the qualities and characteristics that women look for in a man.
Thankfully, males have been pondering women’s dating preferences for so long that the scientific community has begun to respond with an increasing number of explanations. In fact, research on topics ranging from mate choice and compatibility to attraction psychology is revealing fresh information about what women really desire in the men they seek. We’ll talk about what we’ve discovered so far in this piece.
Clarifying The Question
Before we continue, it’s important to note that the question itself is a major factor in why the answer to “what women desire” appears to be so elusive. To be honest, the question is a little offensive since it assumes that all women are the same and have the same wants, desires, and motives. It goes without saying that some ladies prefer slender guys to stronger and more muscular males. There are ladies who don’t give a damn about riches or social standing, and there are other women who would never date an unemployed person. In other words, disparities will always exist.
In the end, a better question could be, “How can I discover what a lady wants?” By wording the question in this way, you recognize the diversity of the women you’ll meet and prevent “stereotyping.” You also urge yourself to evaluate women who may or may not be interested in you using a more individualized approach. Instead of making generalizations about her, you might look into the basic desires, wants, and motives that influence what she looks for in a partner.
Is She Hot? Physical Qualities That Attract Women
Despite it’s common knowledge that women spend more time in front of the mirror, males tend to be more critical of how they look. A 2007 study conducted in Germany found that men valued their partners’ appearance much more than women did. Women were still drawn to beautiful guys, but if a man had other attributes they valued in a partner, they were more inclined to consider dating him. [1]
Another study, this one conducted in 2013, showed that women’s partner choice is extremely contextual. In the test, participants were instructed to rate each other’s attractiveness while participating in speed dating. According to the findings, women who had greater BMIs or less appealing faces were less choosy than their slimmer, more attractive peers. However, when there were more gorgeous women around, these ladies were even less picky. [2] In this instance, she chose her based on her looks rather than his.
However, it appears that some preconceptions around attraction may actually be true. For instance, studies show that women almost universally like taller males. In fact, a 2012 Dutch research found that women are happier with a man who is around 21 cm taller than they are. Contrarily, males feel significantly more at ease when their companion is at least 8 cm taller than they are. [3].
What do all these facts tell us, then? For starters, it indicates that males care about being perceived as physically appealing since they are more inclined to evaluate women according to the same criterion. While attractiveness is essential to women, they often choose partners based on other, more contextual considerations. The availability of competition and their assessments of their own attractiveness are two surprising instances.
Myths, Money, and Status
It’s a common assumption that women exclusively date “wealthy gentlemen” or men with a lot of social standing. There is really a good deal of scientific data to back up this claim, despite it not being expressly true. The 2007 study mentioned above, for instance, also discovered that women are far more inclined to appraise a man based on his perceived position and money. [4]
Another speed dating study from 2013 that found that women were more likely to focus on social status than appearance during partner selection lends weight to this. When asked to select partners for long-term relationships, women were more inclined to depend on these factors. Yet when marriage was off the table, women became considerably more concerned on appearance, even if status continued to be relevant in short-term relationships. [5]
The majority of people won’t find these results particularly unexpected. After all, a man’s ability to get money has always been correlated with his capacity to support a woman and her children. This way of thinking is perhaps so old that it has seeped into our Genetics. In either case, it’s clear that women carefully consider a possible partner’s financial and social standing. The’minimum’ position and wealth needed will, however, probably differ greatly from woman to woman.
Alphas And Betas. Which Personality Wins?
Alphas and betas are not genuinely present in human social groups. These phrases, however, are perfect for classifying particular sorts of men because they are widely used to characterize two main male personality types. We may look at a New Zealand research of 100 males and 100 women attending the University of Canterbury to determine if alpha or beta features are more valued by women.
Women strongly chose “beta” qualities like warmth and dependability when given the choice between a long-term mate who was chilly and beautiful or warm and homey. In contrast, when the women were questioned about potential short-term partners, as in prior research, beauty replaced a man’s lack of personality. [6] Once more, it appears that female partner choice is heavily contextual. In actuality, what individuals desire in a short-term relationship is frequently the exact opposite of what they desire in a long-term relationship.
The most well-known study on female personality preferences was conducted by Richard A. Lippa in 2007. An online survey that was distributed by the BBC eventually reached 98,462 women and 119,733 men. The assignment was straightforward: list the top three qualities you seek in a partner. This was one of 23 qualities that ranged from intelligence and tenacity to parenting skills and beauty. [7]
The women’s top picks? intellect, compassion, honesty, and ideals. These characteristics are in fact mostly linked to less forceful males, even if they are not ‘exclusively’ beta. It’s important to point out that the women’s list also ranked “excellent looks,” “facial beauty,” and “fitness” rather highly. Strangely, despite what previous studies have found,’money,”social standing,’ and ‘prosperity’ were all at the bottom of the list. [8] Were women lying because the exam was anonymous? We most likely won’t ever find out.
Conclusion
Over the past 20 years, more study has been conducted on “what women desire” than at any other time in history. We can draw a few inferences from some of the information in this article, but not many. For instance, we can say with certainty that women will choose partners based on their assessment of both the partner and any prospective rivals.
We may also say that women almost always take social standing into account when choosing partners, including a man’s capacity to support her. And while looks do matter, they matter much less to her happiness in a long-term committed relationship than they do in a brief flirtation.
Therefore, it seems to reason that successful guys are likely to be nice, trustworthy, and funny. Such conventional traits may have ultimately been the secret to what women want. Of course, being tall never hurts.
